7 Unconventional Potty Training Tips

Potty Training, UGH!

It took well over a year for us and it.was.aweful. I learned a lot of lessons along the way, most of which involved me going AGAINST what the books said. So I wanted to pass these lessons on to you, in case you have that itching urge to do the total opposite of what the books tell you.

1. Don’t Overpush: My daughter was willing and excited to go on the toilet at 18months. So I thought, this is great! I then went full-boar into trying to potty train. This meant doing all the things below, and I just overdid it for her. Instead, I should have given her some time to just explore doing it on her time, not mine. I’d give her a few opportunities, but not many. I gave us a potty vacation and re-started it again with this concept and did much better.

2. Try Going By A Routine, Not a Timer: Lots of people said to set a timer for every 20 minutes and go to the bathroom. This just meant that there was a battle every 20 minutes. Plus it always interrupted what we were doing, which caused a big fight with her. Plus it was tough when we were away from home. I noticed my daughter generally had no accidents when we went before and after meals and before and after sleeping–she rarely has to go more than that (although we do try if it’s been a bit). So we just incorporated potty time into our daily routine.

3. Naked time doesn’t always work: Oh man, EVERYONE says to do it, and if it works for your kid, AWESOME. Mine couldn’t care less if pee was running down her naked legs. It just meant my carpet smelled like pee. Honestly, I have found that cloth diapers have been the best way to go. I am not spending money on expensive and not-eco-friendly disposable pull-ups, underwear she just peed into and all over the floor, and right now I am still struggling to find a trainer that I can really trust (most only hold 50-75% of an accident–I’ll keep you posted if I find a solution. The closest one I have had is the Snap-EZ stuff able trainer).

4. Try Video Games: Yeah, you heard that right. Go against everything you are told. But the second my daughter had a video game in her hands, she’d sit there long enough to pee, and then she would get a jelly bean, which gave her a chance to get some positive reinforcement. My son even sits there too, and at a year old went pee. It just keeps them busy long enough (but don’t even get me started on when little man stood up and peed all over my husband’s iPad!). My daughter likes my Kindle Fire (which you can get for a good deal if you use Swagbucks). Books are another good substitute, I just found that they fell easier.

5. Consider Rewarding with Food: Yup, you heard that right. I tried stickers, hugs, etc. Apparently the only way to my daughter’s heart is through Jelly Bellys. She loved going and picking out her color. So you just have to try what works. I know that goes against the books, but that was just what I felt I should do. I think most of the food-reward controversy is in regards to causing people to turn to food for emotional reasons–I personally feel like I should teach my own child how to eat these treats in moderation. But again, to each his/her own!

6. Discipline the Child–But For the Right Reason: I kept reading advice about how you should never discipline when potty training, so I didn’t. But I finally realized that the issue I had was not a potty training issue, but moreso an issue of her not coming to me when asked, or her not going to do something when told to do so. I never cared if she went potty, I cared that she went TO the potty. So if I asked her to go sit on the potty, and she ran away, I gave her time out and explained why it’s important to listen and come when asked. That knocked that habit fairly quickly, although we still have some struggles with that.

7. Discipline YOURSELF: I have found that the most difficult part of potty training is me. I get tired after a long day and just want to get her in bed, instead of giving her a chance to go on the toilet. Or we are in the back of Target and she needs to go…..but I have a cartful of things and the bathrooms are all the way up at the front of the store–so I didn’t take her. This was BAD of me, and I kick myself for it all the time. I have found that my own personal consistency has had the best impact on her and potty training.

Most importantly, read your child throughout this whole process. Consider your own child’s unique needs and personality traits. Remember, YOU are the most qualified person to write a book on your child.

What are your potty training tips?

Emily

I agree with very tip! I especially like the last one. Most of my daughter’s accidents are because I have forgotten to remind her to go potty. Thank you so much for this post!
Leigh

Four or five days in my son was emotionally done with the pee and get an M&M thing, it was to quid pro quo at that point. But he was happy when we sat down together, him on the potty and munched on a few. And so was I. It lasted about a day and by the end of the week the M&Ms were gone and no longer needed.

Growing up we talked about “being like the Queen and go when you can” particularly before we left the house, which really helped set up the routine.

We also did a great tour of all the potties in our neighbor hood to see where we would be peeing. It made training on the go much easier. Trader Joes has the best ones.
Christine

3, 4 and 5 are SO my experience with my oldest daughter. Nothing worked long term. I had to back off and she had to really want to, at least more than she wanted to battle with me. And when it happened she was day and night trained in three weeks. Still, I dread training the other two little ones. Oh yea, and I got so very tired of hearing about naked time or just letting her go in her underwear. She couldn’t have cared less and I got tired of cleaning up pee and poo.
http://www.makingitworkblog.com Carolyn

Huh, this was really informative for me, but probably not in the way you were intending I’ve done potty training for years with kids on the Autism spectrum, and it was a really structured protocol. I’m not afraid of potty training at all at this point, after everything I’ve already gone through But I had no idea what the common “rules” were. Don’t reward with food? That’s such BS! If you want your kid to do something, you need to use WHATEVER will be reinforcing for them (it would obviously be nicer if they’d be motivated to earn a hug or a sticker, but if that fails, then you of COURSE default to primary reinforcement – food and drink! Then you fade that out as time goes by). We also recommended doing whatever it would take to get your kid to stay on the potty, so for a LOT of kids that meant putting on a DVD in the bathroom or giving them something to play with or do (the trick is that you do have to know your kid – sometimes if they’re TOO preoccupied with the toy, they won’t try to go potty. Or you get the sneaky ones that just want to keep watching a movie, so they purposefully hold it! So obviously, you’d change the protocol in that case!) It sounds to ME like all the books are full of bad advice, so I’m so sorry you had to figure it out on your own

Anyhow, I don’t think we’re anywhere near ready for potty training yet, but it’s interesting to at least be aware of what people are told in regards to the topic!)
- Krista
  
  My thoughts exactly!
http://izzyandjohnnys.blogspot.com Elyse

These are EXCELLENT tips. We fell into the same trap of trying to potty train too early. Our daughter showed interest at 15-16mos and we jumped on it, maybe a little too enthusiastically. Naked time was also a disaster. We didn’t try again until she wanted to — at almost 2yrs. We got her some training pants as an early birthday present and traded out her diapers. That worked much better than running around naked. We were vehemently opposed to rewarding with food (although a couple times I did) and it turned out the chicken dance worked out well. It is extremely embarrassing when your child asks for the “potty dance” after a success in the mall and you’re standing in the middle of the ladies’ room doing the chicken dance.
http://twitter.com/summers1405 Shannon Stubbs

We are going through it now. We started a sticker chart and she seems to like that a lot. I too give her something to do, mostly, she plays her games on my phone. I also don’t ask if she wants to go potty, I ask her if she wants to use the big or the little potty. We have a seat attached to our toilet, and our potty seat is in the living room because we are doing EC with the baby whose 6 months old. She tends to go more often in the living room because when she does realize she has to go, she just sits back down.

We have had great luck with the Blueberry Trainers. They are by far my favorites!
Nicole Peerson

You’re exactly right. You have to make it individualized for your own kid. I agree with the discipline part too. In the beginning of potty training we put my son in thicker trainers our a diaper for going out. Then if it wasn’t convenient to use the bathroom, we would say “you’re in a diaper” and then I realized that must be so confusing for him! So now he wears underwear and if he has to pee, I better take him or else there will be pee all over the cart! And once time I had to teach him to pee in a cup because I couldn’t leave the car and he was in such pain trying to hold it! That was an experience.
http://twitter.com/StephKandray Housewife Mama

Wait, did I write this? This has been our story almost exactly! hopefully I have learned from my mistakes when its time to start with #2.
Rachel N

LOVE #6! I completely agree. I expected my children to obey me when I told them it was time to sit on the potty. They didn’t have to GO potty, I can’t make them GO potty but I can make them sit for long enough to read a book or sing a song. We teach and discipline our children in every other area of life, not sure why potty training should be any different.